I write books and make music of my own, and I do a long list of things for other people. Obituaries, funeral programs and memorial slideshows. Photo buttons, keychains and award ribbons, pressed here. Old photos brought back to life. Custom gift baskets built around somebody’s exact favorites. Websites, and publishing other people’s books on Amazon. Custom books, songs and business jingles. Patient tech help for anybody fighting with their phone. Food and store pickup runs when the place you want doesn’t deliver. Logos, resumes, letters, flyers, spreadsheets and QR codes. Cleaning your personal info off people-search sites. Gag gifts sent for you. My own card and board games, printable how-to guides and party games, monthly bulletin and newsletter plans, and referral deals on apps I actually use.
I'd rather stay home. That's how all of this gets made.
Books on Amazon
Novels, kids books, grade-level activity books, humor, and plain-spoken guides, in paperback, hardcover, ebook, and audiobook depending on the title. Tap a cover to see every format on Amazon.
Signed copies
Printable PDF guides · instant download
Step-by-step guides in plain English, with every step spelled out and no experience needed. Pay once and your printable PDF opens right away. Read it on your phone or print it out.
Best value
All 16 guides below for one price.
Use Claude and ChatGPT to write, design, and publish a real book on Amazon for free, or print a private copy just for your family.
Don't want to do it yourself? I'll publish it for you, from $250.
Make songs with Suno, put them on Spotify, Apple Music, and more, and get paid for your streams.
Write, animate, voice and publish your own cartoon series without drawing a thing — and keep the right to earn money from it.
Build a real website that takes orders and payments using AI, for about the cost of a domain name ($10–$11 a year).
Don't want to do it yourself? I'll build the whole site for you, from $150.
Make short videos for TikTok, YouTube Shorts, and Instagram Reels without ever showing your face.
Make planners, checklists, worksheets, wall art, and templates with AI, and sell them on Etsy or your own site.
Get money back on the groceries, gas, and shopping you already do, using free phone apps.
Cancel forgotten subscriptions, cut phone, internet, and insurance costs, and find help programs you may qualify for.
Use Claude to make an app for iPhone and Android, and get it into the App Store and Google Play, even if you've never coded.
Deliver food, groceries, and packages or give rides on your own schedule, and know what you really keep after gas and taxes.
Earn gift cards and cash from surveys, walking, testing websites, and small tasks, and skip the apps that waste your time.
34 easy, budget recipes plus meal plans and grocery lists, written for people who have never really cooked.
Useful things your iPhone or Android can already do that most people never find, plus free apps worth having.
Find real grants, register the right way, and use Claude to write each part of a strong proposal, even if you've never written one.
The honest, step-by-step way to start an online store without keeping inventory, with AI doing the heavy lifting.
A do-it-yourself workbook: read your credit report, fix mistakes for free, handle collectors, and build credit step by step.
Apple Pay, Google Pay, Cash App Pay, or any card. Your download page opens as soon as you pay. Guides are for personal use only; please don't share or resell them.
Made to order
Fill out a request and I'll text or email you back to confirm details and payment.
Custom book
| Book | Private | Amazon |
|---|---|---|
| Kids story book (up to 24 pages) | $75 | $40 |
| Bible stories book (up to 24 pages) | $75 | $40 |
| Gift or keepsake book (up to 24 pages) | $75 | $40 |
| Activity or puzzle book (up to 40 pages) | $55 | $35 |
| Family cookbook (up to 40 pages) | $95 | $50 |
| Memorial photo book (up to 40 pages) | $95 | – |
| Photo book from your own pictures (up to 40 pages) | $95 | – |
| Big photo book from your own pictures (up to 80 pages) | $140 | – |
| Extra printed copy (private books, shipped with your order) | $45 each | – |
Private books are hardcover (activity books are softcover). One shipment to one US address is included.
Photo books: send me up to 300 pictures for a 40-page book or 600 for an 80-page one and I'll pick the best ones and lay them out, or tell me exactly which ones go where. Phone photos are fine — no scanner needed. Got one that's torn or faded? I can restore it first.
Custom photo calendar
| First copy (designed, printed, and shipped to you) | $65 |
| Each extra copy (ordered at the same time) | $40 |
| Print-ready file only (you print it wherever you want) | $35 |
| Start the year on a month that isn't January (school year, anniversary month) | Same price |
Order by December 10 to have it in your hands for Christmas. After that I'll tell you honestly whether it'll make it.
What people put on them
What I need from you
Send me the dates however they come — a list, a text, a picture of the ones written in somebody's old address book. I'll sort it out.
Ordering a stack of them? Six for the family, twenty for the church, forty for the reunion — the price per copy comes down past ten. Tell me how many on the form and I'll quote it before you pay.
Faded, torn, or water-stained picture that has to be in it? I can fix it first, $25 a photo.
Custom song
Already sent your request? Pay $15 here ↗
About releases: I only put songs on my music pages when they fit my catalog, and I can say no to releasing any song for any reason. Diss songs and very personal songs usually stay private. Either way, you still get your finished song file to keep and use however you want.
For businesses & creators
Smaller jobs
All four for $60. Order any of them on the same form.
Done for you
A logo for your business, a resume, a flyer, a program, a spreadsheet, a QR code, or a messy document cleaned up. Pick what you need, tell me about it, and pay once. I email you the finished files. Funeral programs and obituaries are under Funeral & Memorial Help.
New
Logo design
Logo + brand kit
Just the social set
Print-ready design
| T-shirt or apparel design (family reunion, church, team, business, memorial) | $55 |
| Product labels (candles, hair products, food jars, bottles) | $45 |
| Event program (wedding, graduation, banquet, pageant) | $45 |
| Letterhead + invoice template | $40 |
| Yard sign or banner | $35 |
| Church hand fans | $35 |
| Certificates and awards (pair them with award ribbons) | $25 |
| Event or raffle tickets | $25 |
| Gift certificates for your business | $25 |
Who this is for
Starting a business from scratch? A logo, then a website, then a QR code for your cards is the whole setup — tell me that's what you're doing and I'll line it up in order.
Read this part
I design it. I don't print it. For shirts, signs, fans, labels and tickets you get the finished print-ready file and I'll tell you exactly where to take it and what to ask for. That way you pay the printer's real price instead of my markup on top of it.
What I won't do: copy somebody else's logo or make yours "like" a brand you don't own, use a sports team or a character you don't have the rights to, or trace a logo off a picture. If somebody prints it on 200 shirts and you get a letter, that's on both of us.
Jobs & business
| Resume | $35 |
| Cover letter | $20 |
| Resume + cover letter | $50 |
| Flyer | $20 |
| Business card design | $20 |
| Menu or price list | $20 |
| Spreadsheet built for you (budget, inventory, schedule, price list — totals already done) | $45 |
| Slide deck (church, school, work, or a memorial) | $50 |
Events & family
| Invitation or party sign | $20 |
| Photo buttons, keychains & magnets Birthdays, reunions, graduations, teams, events. Order them under Funeral & Memorial Help. | From $5 |
| Family cookbook or memorial photo book Printed and shipped. Order it under Custom books. | From $50 |
Obituaries, funeral programs, memorial slideshows and photo restoration moved to their own section — see Funeral & Memorial Help.
Paperwork help
| Typing up handwritten pages | $4/page |
| Document clean-up & formatting (up to 10 pages) | $25 |
| Fillable PDF form | $30 |
| Proofreading (up to 3 pages) | $20 |
| A letter you don't want to write (complaint, insurance appeal, landlord, school, "please fix this") | $30 |
| Audio typed up (meetings, sermons, interviews, voice notes) | $1.50/min |
QR codes
| Custom QR code (your link, Wi-Fi, contact card, or payment page, in your colors, with your logo if you want) | $10 |
| QR code sign or table tent ("Scan to pay," "Scan for our menu," "Follow us") | $20 |
| QR code sticker sheet (print-ready labels for packages, flyers, or products) | $20 |
| QR Starter Pack (code + sign + sticker sheet) | $40 |
My QR codes never expire and have no monthly fees. I test every code before I send it. If your link changes later, you'll need a new code.
What you get
What I can't do
I'm not a lawyer, tax preparer, or notary, so I can't do these, even if you pay:
For legal help in Illinois, try Illinois Legal Aid Online ↗. For free tax help, look up the IRS VITA program.
Now streaming
Jasmine the Misanthropist
New songs come out regularly. Follow on your favorite app so you catch the next one.
More from me
Send a request and I'll text or email you the total and a secure pay link.
My music, physical
Buttons, keychains & magnets
| Photo button (2¼ inch, pin on the back) | $5 |
| 10 buttons | $40 |
| 25 buttons | $85 |
| 50 buttons | $150 |
| 100 buttons | $275 |
| Photo keychain (same picture, on a key ring) | $8 |
| 10 keychains | $65 |
| 25 keychains | $140 |
| Fridge magnet | $7 |
| 10 magnets | $55 |
| Pocket mirror (picture on one side, mirror on the other) | $9 |
| Bottle opener keychain | $9 |
| Award ribbon badge (the button sits on a pleated ribbon rosette with a tail — like a prize ribbon) | $12 |
| 10 award ribbons | $100 |
| 25 award ribbons | $225 |
| Hair clip or hair tie (their picture or their colors) | $7 |
| Zipper pull (clips on a jacket, backpack, or purse) | $7 |
| Memorial ribbon hanging under a button | +$2 each |
Any picture works — text me a phone photo. I'll show you a proof before I make a hundred of them. If the only picture you have is old or damaged, I can fix it first — see photo restoration above. Mirrors, bottle openers, award ribbons, hair clips and zipper pulls are made to order, so give me a few extra days on those. Everything I make is 2¼ inch — big enough that a face actually reads from across a room. I can't do the tiny stuff like shoe charms or earrings.
Memorial button pack
Most families order between 25 and 50. Grandkids, church members, and coworkers all want one, so people usually wish they'd gotten more rather than fewer.
For churches, schools & banquets
Award ribbons are the one nobody thinks to order until they see one. Usher of the Year, Mother's Day, perfect attendance, field day, pastor's anniversary, sports banquet, pageant, Employee of the Month. A real pleated rosette with their name or picture on it — not a sticker, not a printed certificate that goes in a drawer.
Running an event every year? Put it on a monthly plan and I'll keep your design on file so you just tell me the names.
Mix and match. Order 25 buttons for the family and a few keychains for the ones who'd rather carry it than wear it. Same picture, same price per item either way.
Buttons aren't just for funerals. Same price for birthdays, graduations, family reunions, church events, sports teams, baby showers, bachelorette parties, campaigns, awareness causes, your band, or your business. Any picture, any words, any color.
Done for you · fast
When somebody passes, nobody has time to write an obituary, lay out a program, make photo buttons for the family, and dig through boxes of old pictures. I do all of it, and I work around the service date. Buttons and keepsakes are below, and also in their own section under Buttons & Ribbons.
Words & printing
| Obituary written for you You tell me about them — I'll ask the right questions. Ready for the funeral home or the paper. | $75 |
| Funeral or memorial program Order of service, photos, poem, pallbearers, acknowledgments. Print-ready. | $60 |
| Obituary + program together | $120 |
| Repast or thank-you cards | $30 |
| Memorial bookmarks or keepsake cards Their picture, dates, and a poem or scripture. The thing people keep in a Bible for twenty years. Print-ready. | $35 |
Pictures
| Memorial photo slideshow Up to 60 pictures set to music, with their name and dates. A video file you can play at the service, post, or text to family. | $125 |
| Slideshow on a USB stick, mailed to you | +$20 |
| Old photo restoration Torn, faded, water-stained, blurry, creased. Also works for any old family picture, not just memorials. | $25 each |
| Photo restoration, 5 pictures | $100 |
| Photo restoration, 10 pictures | $180 |
Everything, one price
Service dates come first. Put the date in your request and you go to the front of my line, ahead of everything else I'm working on. If the service is inside 72 hours, say so and I'll tell you straight whether I can make it.
Your pictures. Text or email me phone photos of the originals — you don't have to mail me anything or own a scanner. I'll tell you if one is too far gone before you pay for it. Everything you send me is deleted 30 days after I deliver.
Funeral directors: if you'd rather hand your families one person who handles obituaries, programs, and slideshows, reach out. I'll do your first family free so you can see the work.
Made here, by me
Any picture, any words, any color, pressed 2¼ inch. Family reunions, graduations, birthdays, church events, sports teams, campaigns, awareness causes, your band, your business — and yes, memorials. Award ribbons too, the real pleated kind, not a sticker.
How it works. Send me the picture — a phone photo is fine, you don't need anything special. I'll tell you the total, you pay, and I send you a proof before I press a hundred of them. If your only picture is old or damaged I can fix it first, $25 a photo.
Ordering for a funeral? Put the service date on the form and you go to the front of my line. Everything else I do for families is under Funeral & Memorial Help.
Made to order
Not a generic basket off a shelf. You tell me their exact favorites — their candy, their chips, their drink, their color, the little thing nobody else would think to get — and I go buy it and build it. They open it and know somebody actually paid attention.
Pick a size
Little Something
The Good One
Go All Out
Or just tell me your number
Themes people ask for
Add on
| Local delivery (I bring it to the door) | $15 |
| Shipped anywhere in the US | At cost |
| Balloons attached | $12 |
| A custom song about them (see Custom songs) | +$15 |
| One of my books tucked inside | At cost |
| Rush — ready in 48 hours | +$25 |
How it works. You fill out the form with everything you know about them. I'll text or email you the total, you pay, then I go shop — I don't front the money, and you're never charged more than we agreed. I send you pictures before it leaves my hands. If a store is out of something, I find the closest thing and show you first.
Turnaround is usually 3 to 5 days once you've paid, because I'm hand-shopping for specific things. Need it sooner, add the rush.
Coming soon
I've filed to become a commissioned Illinois notary public. As soon as my commission comes through, I'll come to you — your house, the hospital, the nursing home, your job, after hours — and notarize what you need signed.
Not yet — but soon
I am not commissioned yet, so I can't notarize anything today. My paperwork is filed. This page is here so you know it's coming and what it'll cost. Put your name on the list below and I'll message you the day I'm sworn in.
What it will cost
| Each signature notarized (acknowledgment, jurat, or oath) | $5 |
| I come to you — travel fee, anywhere local | $45 |
| Farther out, or outside normal hours | Quoted first |
| Hospital, nursing home, or jail visit | $65 travel |
| Same-day or after 8pm | +$25 |
Illinois law caps the notary fee itself at $5 per signature, and that's all I'm allowed to charge for the act. The travel fee is separate — it pays for me driving out to you instead of you driving to a bank and hoping their notary is in.
What people need one for
What a notary actually does. I confirm you are who you say you are, that you're signing on purpose and not under pressure, and I stamp and log it. That's it. A notary is not a lawyer. I can't tell you what a document means, whether you should sign it, how to fill it out, or write one for you. If you need that, you need a lawyer — for free legal help in Illinois try Illinois Legal Aid Online ↗.
What you'll need when the time comes: a current government photo ID, the document unsigned (don't sign it until I'm there watching), and anybody else who has to sign present at the same time. If a witness is required, that's on you to bring — I can't be your witness and your notary on the same document.
This page is my posted fee schedule, as Illinois requires of notaries who charge for their services. Prices here are what I'll charge, and I'll update this page if that ever changes.
Patient help, plain English
For anybody who's tired of being made to feel stupid by their own phone. No rushing, no talking over your head, no sighing. I'll explain it as many times as you need, and I'll write it down for you so you have it after I'm gone.
Over the phone or video
In person
Three sessions
Set jobs, set prices
| New phone set up from scratch (everything moved over, contacts, photos, apps, email) | $75 |
| Photos backed up and organized (so you never lose them again) | $60 |
| Passwords cleaned up and written down somewhere safe | $50 |
| Email fixed, cleaned out, or set up fresh | $45 |
| Printer, smart TV, or streaming set up | $50 |
| Phone made easier to see and hear (bigger text, louder, simpler) | $40 |
| Scam and junk call cleanup (blocking, filters, what to never click) | $55 |
What people usually call me about
None of that is a dumb question. Half of it is the phone's fault.
You keep control of your own accounts. I'd rather you type your own passwords while I look away, and I'll never ask for your bank login, your Social Security number, or remote control of your computer for anything you didn't ask me to do. If I ever can't fix it, I'll tell you and you don't pay for that hour.
I write it down. Every visit or call ends with simple written steps for what we did, so next time you can do it yourself. That's the whole point.
What I'm not. I don't repair cracked screens or broken hardware, and I'm not a computer repair shop. I'm the person who sits with you and makes the thing make sense.
Local · same day
The place you want doesn't deliver, or the app wants $30 in fees to bring you a $14 sandwich. Call me instead. You order it, I go get it, I bring it to your door. Food, curbside pickup, a package, whatever you'd go get yourself if you had the time.
Close by
Farther out
Add on
| Each extra stop (two restaurants, a store on the way) | +$15 |
| After 9pm or before 7am | +$15 |
| Right now, this hour | +$15 |
| Wait in a line longer than 20 minutes | +$15 |
That's my fee for the run. The food or the merchandise is separate and it's yours to pay for — see below.
How the food gets paid for
Two ways, and you pick. Either way I'm not out of pocket and you're not paying me a markup on your own dinner.
I don't front the money and I don't take a cut of your food. The $50 is the whole thing I'm charging you.
What people have me go get
What I won't pick up
None of that is me being difficult. It's all either illegal for me or a good way to lose my car.
I'm not DoorDash. I don't take your order, I don't call it in, and I don't guess at what you want. You place the order, I go get it. That way it's exactly right, there's no app markup on the menu price, and the restaurant gets paid what they actually charge.
How the time works. Tell me what time you want it in your hands, not what time you placed the order. I'll tell you straight whether I can make it. If the restaurant runs behind, I'll text you from the parking lot instead of letting you wonder.
Where I run. Bellwood and the surrounding suburbs, and the city when it's not rush hour. If you're not sure whether you're in range, ask — it's a free question and I'll tell you honestly instead of taking the money and showing up late.
Regulars. If this turns into a standing thing — every Friday, every payday, every time your show comes on — tell me and we'll just set a time. You won't have to fill this out again.
Done for you
A real website for your business, church, side hustle, or event — built, launched, and yours. You own the domain and the site, hosting is free, and there is no monthly bill for the site itself. This page you're reading is one I built the same way.
Pick a package
Starter
Business
Store
Your domain name
After it's live
Works on a site I built or one you already have
Little tools that sit on your website and do the talking for you at 2am. You pay me once and there is no monthly fee for any of these — they run inside your own page, not on somebody's service, so there's no subscription and nothing that shuts off.
Instant price estimator
Answer-the-same-questions bot
Booking request form
Review router + QR card
"Do you come out this far?"
"Which one do I need?"
Putting them together
| Any add-on, bought with a new site I'm building | −$50 |
| Any three together | −$75 |
| Changing the answers or prices later | $25 |
| Covered by website care instead (up to 12 changes) | $100 a year |
Being straight with you about what these are
These are not AI chatbots. A real AI bot costs money every time somebody talks to it, and that bill would land on you every month forever. These don't. They're built out of your own answers and your own prices, written out ahead of time, so they're free to run, they never make something up about your business, and they never stop working because a bill didn't get paid.
What that means in practice: they handle the questions you already know people ask. They won't hold a conversation about anything else, and they'll hand somebody your form the moment they're out of their depth. That's on purpose.
What hosting costs: nothing. Your site runs on Cloudflare Pages, which is free for a site like yours. The only thing you pay for every year is the domain name itself. There is no monthly hosting bill, no "website builder" subscription, and nothing that shuts your site off if you stop paying me.
How I work. I build these with AI tools and my own hands, the same way I built this site — that's why I can charge what I charge. What you're paying for is the finished thing, done right, without you having to learn any of it. When it's done I hand you every login, and the site and domain are in your name.
What I don't do. Online stores that track inventory, print shipping labels, and handle returns — that's what Shopify is for, and I'll say so rather than take your money. Member logins, databases, or phone apps. Copying someone else's website. Anything built to look like a company or person it isn't. Medical, legal, or money claims I can't back up.
Done for you
You wrote it. I'll turn it into a real book for sale on Amazon — paperback and Kindle — under your name, in your account, with the money going to your bank. I've done this for every book I sell, so you're not paying me to figure it out on your book.
Pick a package
Cover only
Format & publish
Everything
Add to any package
| Each extra book after the first (same author, booked together) | −$50 off |
| Series set up so your books show as Book 1, 2, 3 on Amazon | $40 |
| Large-print edition of the same book | $75 |
| Proofreading your manuscript (spelling, grammar, punctuation — up to 40,000 words) | $120 |
| An author website so people can find you (see Websites) | From $150 |
| 3-day rush on any package | +$100 |
What it costs you after that: nothing. Amazon doesn't charge to publish or to list your book. They print each copy only when someone buys it and keep part of the price, and the rest is paid to you every month. There is no setup fee, no monthly fee, and no box of books in your garage. I don't take any part of your sales — you pay me once and every dollar after that is yours.
It's your book and your account. The KDP account goes in your name with your bank and tax info, which only you can enter. I work in it with your permission while I'm setting things up, and you change the password when I'm done. Your copyright stays yours. You can unpublish, change the price, or move the book anywhere, any time, without asking me.
Want to do it yourself instead? My $15 guide Publish Your Own Book with AI walks you through the same steps I use. Buy the guide, or hand me the book — either way you end up published.
What I don't do. I don't write your book for you, and I won't run it through AI to "finish" it — I format and publish what you wrote. I can't promise sales, reviews, or a bestseller tag; nobody honestly can. I can't publish something you don't own the rights to, song lyrics or long quotes you don't have permission for, or someone else's pictures. Amazon reviews books before they go live and can reject one, and if they do I'll tell you exactly why and fix what I can.
Done for you
Sites like Spokeo, Whitepages, and hundreds of other "people search" sites list your name, address, age, relatives, and phone number for anyone to see. Removal services fix that, but setting one up is tedious. I'll do it for you.
Pick a package
Basic
Plus
Complete
Family add-on · up to 6 people
Important: removal only keeps working while the subscription is paid. Services like OneRep scan and remove your info every month for as long as you're subscribed. If it stops, scanning and removals stop, and sites can re-list you. You can pay the service yourself (OneRep is about $15/month or $100/year for one person, about $28/month or $180/year for a family of up to 6), or pick a managed plan and I'll run it for you: $19/month or $130/year for one person, $35/month or $220/year for a family. Managed plans renew automatically until you cancel, and you can cancel anytime. Already on a managed plan? Manage or cancel your plan here ↗
Hands-off for you. You give me your details once, sign below, and I handle the rest. I can create the logins and passwords for your privacy accounts myself, keep them locked in an encrypted password manager while I work, and hand them all over to you when I'm done. Results take time, and no one can guarantee every listing is removed. Anything that only you can log into, like your Google account, social media, or a credit freeze, is not included, but I'm happy to walk you through it on a quick call if you ever want to. This is not credit repair and not a background check, and I only work on the privacy of the person signing below.
Same thing, every month
Some things aren't a one-time job. If you need the same thing made over and over — a bulletin every Sunday, a newsletter every month, posts for your page — put it on a plan and stop re-ordering it. No contract. Cancel any month, keep everything I already made you.
Church, school, or club
Newsletter
Social media posts
Already on the site
Already on the site
How paying works. First month up front, then the same amount on the same day each month. I'll send you a secure link; you can cancel it yourself any time, or just tell me and I'll stop it. Nothing is locked in and there's no cancellation fee. If you cancel, every file I already made you is still yours to keep and use.
Fair use. Plans cover the amount listed — four bulletins, one newsletter, twelve graphics. If a month runs long, I'll tell you the extra cost before I do the work instead of surprising you on the bill. Need two of these? Take $10 a month off the second plan.
Coming soon
Real games I made myself — actual cards in an actual box, mailed to your door. Not a download, not a printable. Written in my voice, for grown folks who know each other well enough to be petty about it.
Not yet — but close
These aren't ready to ship today. The first one is designed and going to the printer. Put your name on the list below and I'll message you the day it's ready, before I tell anybody else. First run is small, so the list goes first.
Card game · first one out
Board game · in the works
How this is different from my printable games
| These games (this page) | A real boxed game, mailed to you. Nothing to print, nothing to cut. |
| Printable Games | A PDF you download and print at home, right away, for your own parties. |
Different things, different prices. If you want something tonight, the printable ones are instant. If you want it in a box with a lid, that's this page.
Reunions, parties and group orders. Ordering for a family reunion, a church trip, a bus ride, or stocking a shelf? Say how many on the form and I'll quote it — the price per copy comes down on a real order. I also do buttons and ribbons, T-shirt designs and photo calendars for the same reunion, so it can all come from one person and match.
Want your own game made? If you've got a game in your head — your family's inside jokes, your church, your line, your job — I can build it and get it printed for you. Tell me about it on the form and I'll give you a real price.
Printable PDF games · instant download
Print-and-play games for parties, holidays, and family nights. Pay once, download right away, and print as many copies as you need for your own parties.
Best value
All 5 party packs: baby shower, bridal shower, birthday, Christmas, and family game night.
A print-and-play escape room for families and friends. Solve 9 puzzles and crack the shutdown code before the Pickle-Tron 3000 turns everyone into pickles!
Everything you need for a fun baby shower. Just print and play.
Fun, classy games for any bridal shower, from bingo to "Who Knows the Bride Best?"
Party games for teens and adults, with kid-friendly picks marked.
Holiday games for work parties, family gatherings, and friends, including a gift-swap dice game.
Screen-free fun for all ages, any night of the week.
Apple Pay, Google Pay, Cash App Pay, or any card. Your download page opens as soon as you pay. For personal use only; please don't share or resell the files.
Just for laughs
Want to prank a friend with a glitter bomb, a confetti bomb, a message potato, or a box of (real) animal poop but don't feel like doing it yourself? Pick a prank or combo, tell me where, pay once, and I'll handle the rest.
Pick a single prank or a combo pack. Every price includes the gift, shipping, and my fee. You pay once, I place the order, and I email you the tracking number.
Singles
| Glitter bomb letter | $18 |
| Glitter bomb card | $20 |
| Cow dung, quart | $38 |
| Elephant crap, quart | $39 |
| Gorilla poop, quart | $40 |
| Cow dung, gallon | $48 |
| Elephant crap, gallon | $49 |
| Gorilla poop, gallon | $50 |
| "Gotcha, You Looked!" letter | $12 |
| Fake winning lottery ticket | $15 |
| Confetti bomb (less messy than glitter) | $35 |
| Message potato (your message on a real potato, up to 130 characters) | $38 |
| Dirt Bag (a sack of dirt with a "You're a dirtbag" card) | $22 |
| Eat Poop chocolate (realistic chocolate poop in an "Eat Sh*t" box) | $32 |
| Box in a Box in a Box (five boxes deep) | $42 |
Combo packs
| Sparkle Attack Glitter bomb letter + glitter bomb card | $33 |
| Double Trouble Cow dung quart + glitter bomb letter | $51 |
| The Works Gorilla poop gallon + glitter bomb card | $65 |
| Birthday Ambush Message potato + confetti bomb | $65 |
Combo items ship separately from each gift company, so they may arrive on different days.
Handmade prank boxes
| Baby Doll Surprise A baby doll wrapped in a blanket, with a pacifier, a birth certificate and care instructions (it's a doll) | $38 |
| Pet Rock Adoption Kit A rock with googly eyes, adoption papers, a tiny leash and a feeding schedule | $28 |
| The Box That Never Ends Box inside box inside box, each one wrapped, with one Tootsie Roll at the very end | $45 |
| Beach Vacation in a Box A bag of sand, a tiny umbrella, flip-flops and a postcard: "Here's the vacation you wanted" | $32 |
| Rubber Duck Invasion 20 tiny rubber ducks and a note: "They've found you." | $27 |
| Employee of the Month (of the Couch) A trophy, a paper crown and an official certificate for their couch skills | $27 |
Put together by me and shipped in 3 to 5 business days, with tracking. The return address is my business mailbox, never yours.
Mini pranks
| One Sock Delivery A single sock and a note: "Found your other one" | $12 |
| Googly Eye Attack 100 googly eyes and a note: "Put them everywhere" | $12 |
| Rubber Duck Mini 5 tiny rubber ducks and a note: "They've found you" | $12 |
| Confetti Card A card packed with paper confetti and your funny message | $12 |
| Emergency Snack Kit Wrapped candy with a "break in case of hunger" note | $15 |
| Pet Rock Mini A googly-eyed rock with adoption papers | $15 |
| Tiny Trophy A mini trophy and a "World's Okayest ___" certificate | $15 |
| Clown Application Approved A red foam nose and an official approval letter | $15 |
| Worst Gift Ever Certificate A printed certificate and one Tootsie Roll, in a card | $10 |
| You've Been Adopted Letter An adoption certificate from the Society of Weird Friends | $10 |
| Roach Surprise 100 realistic fake (plastic) cockroaches and a note: "Found these at your place" | $18 |
Small, cheap, and they still get a laugh. Put together by me and mailed in 3 to 5 business days.
Adults only (18+)
| Naughty birthday glitter card (glitter in a very adult shape) | $22 |
| Bag of D*cks gummies | $25 |
| Grow a Pair (novelty that grows in water) | $24 |
| Eat a D*ck chocolate | $35 |
Only for adults who are fine with adult humor. Never to a workplace or a home where kids open the mail.
What you get
House rules. Gag gifts are for friends and family who will laugh. I don't look up addresses, so you must already know it. I won't send to an ex, anyone who has asked you to leave them alone, anyone covered by a protection or no-contact order, anyone under 18, or anyone you're in a dispute with at work, school, or in court. Messages can't include threats, slurs, sexual content, or anything about someone's race, religion, or body. One order per person every 90 days. I don't share your name with the recipient, but I will cooperate with law enforcement if the law requires it. I can turn down any order.
Good to know
Send the form for what you want, and a pay button shows up right under it. You can pay with Apple Pay, Google Pay, Cash App Pay, or any debit or credit card. Payments go through Stripe, so I never see your card number.
As soon as your payment goes through. I email you within 1 business day if I need anything else, like photos or files.
Songs, jingles, and documents usually take a few days. Custom books take about 1 to 2 weeks to make, plus printing and shipping. Signed copies ship in about 2 to 3 weeks. Gag gift timing depends on the gift company. How-to guides download instantly.
Yes. I only use it to fill your order, and I never sell it. Read the details on my Privacy & Terms page.
Message me through the form at the bottom of the page and I'll make it right. Songs, books, and documents include changes before they're final. Refund rules for each service are on the terms page.
Not right now. Everything ships to US addresses only.
No. You pay once for the build, and the only bill after that is your domain name, about $10 to $12 a year, paid to the registrar and not to me. Hosting is free. If you want me on call for changes, that's $25 a change or $100 a year for up to 12, and it's optional. The site and the domain are in your name, so nothing shuts off if you stop working with me.
No. You pay me once to format, design, and upload it. The Amazon account is in your name with your bank info, so Amazon pays you directly every month and I never touch it. Your copyright stays yours and you can change the price or unpublish any time without asking me.
Any month, with no fee and no contract. Tell me or cancel the payment link yourself. Everything I already made you is still yours to keep and use.
Maybe! Send me a message and tell me what you have in mind.
Join my email list for new releases and deals. A few emails a month at most. You'll get an email to confirm, and you can unsubscribe anytime.